Lou Gold wrote: ↑Sat Apr 15, 2023 9:21 am
Ooops, sorry Federica. My bad.
But your post triggered (for me) great questions: Does anyone here think that they've let go of their ego or that coming or going is in their case not ego driven? Although I've met a wide range of more and less balanced egos, I've never met someone without one. I've read about some but I'm wondering if anyone here has actually met a person without an ego? Does anyone here actually want to be egoless?
I was using ‘ego’ in the common sense, not in the sense of ego-consciousness, or of individuation.
I guess we could see it in terms of polarity. Within the context of the world process, a healthy ego depends on the balance between the polarities of extreme humility and extreme pride. If we disregard self-determination completely, intents dissolve in the soup of total depersonalization, and it’s impossible to ground the will. At the polar opposite of extreme pride, it’s impossible to imagine being wrong, being less-than, unaware-of, and there’s hardly any room for feeling truly thankful, grateful, or prestigeless. But it’s enough that the ego is even only slightly out of balance towards one or the other end, for the soul to experience some friction, sooner or later, on the path of spiritual development. I know it from experience.
When confronted with a new step on the path, the over-inflated ego is only ready to consider it as an additional piece of knowledge to incorporate, rather than a fully unknown qualitative leap, unknown in both its essence and its modality. Correspondingly, gratitude and thankfulness are
granted, rather than entered. In other words, one sees the own cone of awareness as fixed in its apex, and only variable in the degrees of its aperture. So one is ready to
grant recognition and gratitude to new pieces of knowledge appearing within the growing aperture of the cone, not to
abandon oneself in gratitude in the volume of unknown intelligence that encompasses the apex from all ‘sides’, letting go of the fixed point of self-origin (apex). This makes the feeling of gratitude unconsciously self-reflective, rather than outwardly shining, and limits spiritual development to incorporation of additional pieces within a set environment. Naturally, this attitude emerges in one’s relationship with the Spirit, as well as in human relationships.
On the other extreme end, if the ego has no solid ground, it’s impossible to find orientation and follow any route. A point of self-reference needs to be there in defined form, working as a soundbox to echo the inputs, so one can use the feedback for continuous adjustment. It doesn’t matter that it’s imperfect, as long as it's kept ‘scalable’.
So what I meant is, in order to quench the thirst for knowledge one has to find a balanced route for the ego, where self-origin is maintained in individuated form, but also scalable, rather than simply extensible. And if one prefers to stay strong and immovable in that origin instead, then the thirst for knowledge cannot be quenched, but only renounced, or numbed.